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“Mother, you won’t need all of this crap. Now please pack your clothing in the designated bin.”
“This is my home.”
“We’ve talked about this a million times.”
No talking, just lectures and plans “for my own good”.
“The river is dangerous.”
I taught you to swim here.
“God, what are all these dust collectors? Hand me the trash bin.”
Just memories: my father’s clock, vases from a lover, a sailboat from my dead son.
Memories that even you can’t take away from me.
“Yes, dear. Now why are we packing?”
Tracey Delaplain, MD 
The reality of this, with a mother who kept everything, I know well… unfortunately she couldn’t remember why she kept them before we moved her to a home… and it was hard to convince her… I hope we did it well for her…
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I had a similar experience with moving my Dad at 90 but he was very aware of what was happening which make it painful for both of us. His body failed him but his mind stayed sharp.
Thanks for coming by my new blog Bjorn.
Tracey
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Bittersweet tale, beautifully done.
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Thanks for the compliment and for taking the time to comment Ink.
Tracey
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Great memories and the mom is right to hang on them. But maybe it is time for the mom to go else where, and the memories to go away as well. But couldn’t the daughter keep them? (I presume that is the mother talking in the last three lines. Correct?)
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Yes the Mom is talking in her head mostly. I think the daughter just wants to get rid of all the junk, maybe including her Mother.
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Oh, it seems she has some memories – the distant ones and is losing the day-to-day bits. Nicely told in just a few words. Sometimes “junk” means a lot.
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One old woman’s memories are a daughter’s junk. It will happen to all of us at some point. I’m thinking about decluttering for that very reason.
Thanks for dropping by,
Tracey
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One old woman’s memories – a daughter’s junk. But for the next generation they’d be a discovery. Good one Tracey, and like the blog.
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Thank you. I’m sure my sons would throw away most of my stuff too.
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This is a quite touching tale, but also a scathing attack on the next generation’s view of their parent’s possessions and values.
Powerful piece, Doc.
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True. My sons shutter at the thought of cleaning out our homes some day.
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Junk is so valuable, recycle is my mantra, liked your story
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I’m really trying to not buy anything more. Thanks Mike.
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well, after all are said and done, nothing will be left but memories.
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True, the rest is just stuff.
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This is not a very compassionate daughter. The mother’s compensation will be the thought that her daughter will get older too. A place that doesn’t give you room to bring keepsakes isn’t a good place.
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That’s for sure.
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The clash between practicality and sentimentality can be quite painful. I hope to learn some lessons and make it easy for my children when the time comes …and hope I remember my lessons .
Well written Tracey. Will start following your new blog site too.
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We have discussed this but when is the time right to declutter just to make it easier on your kids? It’s a first world problem to have too many possessions.
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Decluttering now and it’s a dusty business. Memories stay fresh though. Sad for the lady though, mean of her daughter to throw all of the trinkets away
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Mean but necessary. I’ve been the mean daughter and it’s a very painful experience.
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I love the line about the mother’s memories. What a zinger! She’s got some good ones in there just for her. It’s hard to know how to help someone up in their years. You know what’s good for them and yet it seems because they are in their last years, they should do what they like. Great story, Tracey. I like the new blog!
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Something so many of us at this age can relate to
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On many levels. What do we do with our parent’s junk and what do we do with our own? I’m really trying to declutter. Honest, I am.
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I’ve just been through this. My mother had to move into a smaller place and she had so much stuff. It just wouldn’t fit. I’m doing the same as you – getting rid of my own clutter. Also, I’ve made up some ‘treasure boxes’ for keepsakes, and they’re organised and labelled so no-one could possibly mistake them for ‘junk’. I love how you dealt with this difficult issue in your story, Tracey. The words, and the silent thoughts, of the mother are very moving.
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Good idea. I’m afraid my sons will have no concept of “heirlooms”. I try to use my best crystal and china. There’s no reason to save it for special occasions. Thank you Margaret.
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Good story. We had to move my mother to a nursing home when her Alzheimer’s became advanced and her body started to break down as well as her mind. She hung on for six more years, living to be almost 93. She seemed to recognize we were her family when we visited. They took great care of her. — Suzanne
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So many difficult decisions some of us have the privledge of making for our parents.
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